Day 27: A letter to you guys, my readers

Day 27: A letter to your readers

My dear readers,

I want to let you know that I am truly grateful for every written word that you have read. It means so much to me; I can't even explain. You encourage me to write more and I hope I encourage you to seek ways to explain and communicate yourself as well. The only way in this world that we differ from animals is that we can talk. We have the ability to express ourselves, our pain, our happiness and any other emotion that we may feel. We have the ability to make the world a better place for our future generations and we have the ability to be great every single day that we wake up. 

If you guys ever decide to blog, know that you have a number one fan. Me! Let me know your link and I will read it and give you pointers. I'm not amazing at blogging like some people, but I can give you pointers. I would love it if someone paid me to drink coffee and blog from home, but we all know that will never happen. Maybe I can be a stay-at-home-mom...without the mom part. Haha who am I kidding? I'd get bored in a week after rearranging my house a bagillion times and then go out drinking.

My family doesn't really follow me on here. My older sister may have read a few, a few friends read it when I write something interesting. The few of you that read my blog religiously know parts of me that I don't tell a lot of people. That's because this blog is my cover. This blog is my safety net and also this blog stops me from smacking the shit out of people and going to jail. 

Thank you. I can never say it enough. Thank you for being here. Thank you for reading. Thank you for asking me questions, giving me things to blog about and giving me feedback.

I would also like to thank some of you for being complete and utter fucktards and giving me something to bitch about.

I love you all. <3

Day 26: I read this today and...

Day 26: Something you read online. Leave a link and discuss, if you'd like.

This is one of the best articles I have read in a really long time. I won't discuss it. I just want you guys to read it because it's in depth and it explains everything. It's also amazing and life-changing.

"The covers of most men's and women's magazines have similar headlines: "Get Great Abs" and "Have Amazing Sex."

From the looks of it, these two issues have been recycled over and over (with some other stereotypically gender-relevant articles thrown in) on every Men's Health, Maxim,Cosmopolitan and Glamour cover since the dawn of time. In fact, I'd bet that if we could get a better translation of cave drawings, they would read something like "Grok get flat belly. Make girl Grok moan with joy."

And we keep buying them. We keep buying this lie that these things will make us happy. I've had washboard abs (past tense) and I've had some pretty phenomenal sex. Neither one made me a better person. Neither one completed me or made my life more fulfilling.

We chase this idea of "I will be happy when... "

I will be happy when I have a new car. I will be happy when I get married. I will be happy when I get a better job. I will be happy when I lose five pounds. What if instead we choose to be happy -- right now?

If you can read this, your life is pretty awesome.

Setting aside our first-world problems and pettiness, if you are online reading this, you have both electricity and WiFi or access to them. Odds are you are in a shelter of some sort, or on a smart phone (and then kudos to you for reading this on the go). Life might bump and bruise us, it may not always go the way we plan and I know I get frustrated with mine, but here's the thing: You are alive.

Because you are alive, everything is possible. So about those eight tips...

1. Stop believing your bullshit.

All that stuff you tell yourself about how you are a commitment phobe or a coward or lazy or not creative or unlucky? Stop it. It's bullshit, and deep down you know it. We are all insecure 14 year olds at heart. We're all scared. We all have dreams inside of us that we've tucked away because somewhere along the line we tacked on those ideas about who we are that buried that essential brilliant, childlike sense of wonder. The more we stick to these scripts about who we are, the longer we live a fraction of the life we could be living. Let it go. Be who you are beneath the bullshit.

2. Be happy now.

Not because The Secret says so. Not because of some shiny happy Oprah crap. But because we can choose to appreciate what is in our lives instead of being angry or regretful about what we lack. It's a small, significant shift in perspective. It's easier to look at what's wrong or missing in our lives and believe that is the big picture -- but it isn't. We can choose to let the beautiful parts set the tone.

3. Look at the stars.

It won't fix the economy. It won't stop wars. It won't give you flat abs, or better sex or even help you figure out your relationship and what you want to do with your life. But it's important. It helps you remember that you and your problems are both infinitesimally small and conversely, that you are a piece of an amazing and vast universe. I do it daily -- it helps.

4. Let people in.

Truly. Tell people that you trust when you need help, or you're depressed -- or you're happy and you want to share it with them. Acknowledge that you care about them and let yourself feel it. Instead of doing that other thing we sometimes do, which is to play it cool and pretend we only care as much as the other person has admitted to caring, and only open up half way. Go all in -- it's worth it.

5. Stop with the crazy making.

I got to a friend's doorstep the other day, slightly breathless and nearly in tears after getting a little lost, physically and existentially. She asked what was wrong and I started to explain and then stopped myself and admitted, "I'm being stupid and have decided to invent lots of problems in my head." Life is full of obstacles; we don't need to create extra ones. Don't take things personally. Most of the time, other people's choices and attitudes have absolutely nothing to do with you. Unless you've been behaving like a jerk, in which case...

6. Learn to apologize.
Not the ridiculous, self-deprecating apologizing for who you are and for existing that some people seem to do (what's up with that, anyway?). The ability to sincerely apologize -- without ever interjecting the word "but" -- is an essential skill for living around other human beings. If you are going to be around other people, eventually you will need to apologize. It's an important practice.

7. Practice gratitude.

Practice it out loud to the people around you. Practice it silently when you bless your food. Practice it often. Gratitude is not a first world only virtue. I saw a photo recently, of a girl in abject poverty, surrounded by filth and destruction. Her face was completely lit up with joy and gratitude as she played with a hula hoop she'd been given. Gratitude is what makes what we have enough. Gratitude is the most basic way to connect with that sense of being an integral part of the vastness of the universe; as I mentioned with looking up at the stars, it's that sense of wonder and humility, contrasted with celebrating our connection to all of life.

8. Be kind.

Kurt Vonnegut said it best (though admittedly, and somewhat ashamedly -- I am not a Vonnegut fan): "There's only one rule that I know of, babies -- 'God damn it, you've got to be kind.'"

Kindness costs us nothing and pays exponential dividends. I can't save the whole world. I can't bring peace to Syria. I can't fix the environment or the health care system, and from the looks of it, I may end up burning my dinner.

But I can be kind.

If the biggest thing we do in life is to extend love and kindness to even one other human being, we have changed the world for the better.

That's a hell of a lot more important than flat abs in my book."

Like I said..AMAZING read!

Day 25: Let me tell you about you

Day 25: Something someone told you about yourself that you'll never forget (good or bad)

Before I was born, my mom had a neighbor who she absolutely loved. They had coffee every day. They were really good friends. Mom was pregnant at the time with me and Mira would often help out.

Then I was born. The first time Mira laid eyes on me, she studied me and my face for a while and then told my mother I was the next Socrates. My mother smiled and took the compliment, but she didn't really believe how true that was until I started speaking.

The first time mom told me this story was in Junior High when I felt different than everyone else. The girls were chasing boys, the boys were chasing the girls and all I was worried about was saving the world.

As I grew, I looked at everything with such depth. I always asked why and often researched to find the answers. My friends always knew that they could come to me with any situation because I could see both points of view and would be of great benefit with advice.

I often bear the burden of being a thinker. Sometimes it would just be easier to be stupid. It would be easier to watch the news and go along with any bullshit the government feeds us. It would be easier to be in relationships, to hear the lies and deceit and still believe that person. It would be easier to manage friendships and to have a job. Life is much easier when you're stupid; ignorance is bliss.


I believe that woman cursed me. May she rest in peace.

Day 24: Worst traits

Day 24: Your top 3 worst traits

As much as I don't really want to blog today...Here it is.

1. Stubbornness (ask my mother)
2. Indecisiveness (just ask where I want to eat and you'll see)
3. Understanding (I've been understanding for far too long and the only person that ever gets hurts by it, is me. Sometimes I'd like to just say "I don't fucking care about your problems" and be selfish..too bad that's not who I am)

Short but sweet day. I have many bad traits and every single one I know and acknowledge. I am not afraid of my own shadow. I am able to admit my bad qualities and live with them. I don't have anything to hide. Ever.

Day 23: School doesn't teach

Day 23: Things you've learned that school won't teach you

School will teach you how to read and write but will not teach you to understand.

School will teach you how to share your crayons and work in a group, but will not teach you compassion and caring.

School will teach you what to do in your career, but it will not teach you how to keep a job.

School doesn't teach you how to party, how to love, how to cure a broken heart or even how to not freak out when something goes wrong with your car.

I've learned how to be tolerant of others even when they dry hump my last nerve. I've learned how to speak my mind and develop my own individual style. I've learned that high school and college are nothing like real life. I've learned the world is really as cold as we all think it is. I've learned that people deal with tough situations every day. I've learned that after a fall, sometimes you gotta stay down until you are ready to stand up again. I've learned motivational quotes are just words until you give them power. I've learned the only person that will never betray you doesn't exist; even the person in the mirror gives up on you sometimes.


I've learned how to live for myself; how to provide for, nurture and take care of me.

Life isn't a race. There isn't a number one spot. Slow down, breathe and take everything day by day, moment by moment. Don't worry about the past. It's already gone. Don't worry about the future. It hasn't even come here yet. Worry about today.


Thanks, Day 23. I wish you could do magic things like erase people from my life.

Day 22: My soapbox

Day 22: Rant about something. Get up on your soapbox and tell us how you really feel. (a pet peeve, a current event, a controversial topic, something your husband or roommate or neighbor or boss does that really ticks you off)

This isn't safe. Asking me what bothers me is like poking a lion with a stick when you don't have a fence in between you. It's dangerous and you will get eaten alive.

I will not talk politics, because that just pisses me off. I will not talk controversial topics, because that just makes me want to go change the world.

My pet peeve right now is people asking me when I am going to get married. First of all, just because you got trapped, doesn't mean you have to ask when others will be joining you. Second of all, marriage is a big deal to me. I won't do it because someone tells me I can't. I won't do it because I feel sorry for the person I'm with. I won't do it for convenience or any kind of underlying interest. I won't do it if I am not 100% sure. Third of all, finding someone that you think possess that kind of forever love? Impossible.

No, guys, seriously I'm fine. Stop asking! I enjoy my life. I go out when I want to. I drink. I stay out late. I don't have to worry about cooking for anyone. My apartment stays clean. I don't have to pick up anyone else's shit. I do laundry only for me. I wash dishes when I want to. You know what's sweeter than the sound of a child's laughter? The sound of silence from not having any fucking kids.

Don't get me wrong. I absolutely adore kids. I have a married couple that I sometimes hang out with and I absolutely love them. They have two kids, and every time we go over there, their kids are always in my lap or around me waiting for me to read books, play with them, or just generally talk to them. I, never for one minute, found them annoying or wanted them to go away. I absolutely adore their children. They're so much fun and they are so interesting.

Also, did you forget I went to school to be an elementary school teacher?? So, yeah, I love kids. I want kids, just not now. Maybe not ever. Maybe I just want to adore your child and then go the fuck home! Who knows!? Who cares?! It's my life.

It's called knowing what you want and I want to be selfish. I don't want a husband to tell me what to do. I don't want to feel tied down. I don't want to learn how to cook yet. I don't want to lose my identity. I want to travel, enjoy my life, drink, party and not have a care in the world.

So the next time you ask me "when am I getting married", I'll politely smile and ask "when are you getting divorced?"


<3

Day 21: Favorite blog posts

Day 21: A list of links to your favorite posts in your archives

SPAIN!!!!

Day 2 in Spain

We never get there

Baring my soul

My mother

Life in a shit town

HERBIE!!!

Romance

Day 20: Real talk

Day 20: Get real. Share something you're struggling with right now.

I struggle with a lot on a daily basis. I already talked about my step-dad. That's a huge struggle every day, all day. 

Another thing I struggle with is the urge to travel. On one hand, I am saving money and paying off all my debt one by one, but there is a small flame inside me that is pushing me to say "screw it" and go on a two week vacation to Cancun or Hawaii or somewhere exotic where I don't know anyone.

It's hard feeling like you aren't living your life to the fullest because you are counting days to that paycheck or because you are more focused on responsibilities rather than living.

There is one quote that's always stuck in my head and I use it often. "Don't let making a living prevent you from making a life."

I know this isn't a huge battle but it's big to me. One day I will eventually fly away.. 

One day..

Day 19: IPOD shuffle

Day 19: Put your IPOD on shuffle and list 10 songs as they play

Since I am Bosnian, I am going to have to cheat here and just post the 10 American songs for you guys!

1. Pitbull- Back in time

2. Hot Chelle Rae- I like it like that

3. Mickey Avalon- Jane Fonda

4. Sia- Breathe me

5. Ginuwine- Pony

6. Tech N9ne- Midwest Choppers

7. Cascada- Evacuate the dance floor

8. Seether- Careless Whisper

9. Seether ft. Amy Lee- Broken

10. B.o.B.- Airplanes

Day 18: Childhood story

Day 18: Tell a story from your childhood. Dig deep and try to be descriptive about what you remember and how you felt.

My most remembered memory is when my mother caught me smoking. Right next to the apartment buildings where all of my friends and I lived, we had an old abandoned old house that was destroyed during the war. The only thing left of the house was the outside skeleton. My friend and I stole a couple of cigarettes from our mothers, cause we thought we were the shit and they'd never find out. We went into the old house, and climbed up the stairs to the second floor balcony. The balcony didn't have any bars so it was completely open, but if you sat up against the wall, no one from the bottom could see you.

But they could hear you..

Here comes my mother screaming out my name. Standing downstairs trying to catch a peek of the upstairs balcony. She hears me. I know she does because all I hear is "Gabriela, I know you're up there" and a few choice Bosnian cuss words. So, Gorana and I put out our cigarettes. We put gum in our mouths and we walked downstairs cool, calm and collected. Nothing happened. We weren't doing anything wrong.

Prove it!!!

My mother grabs my arm, and drags me home. On the way up to our apartment, she is smacking my legs with the smallest switch (little, tiny, skiny branch of a tree) she could find. Those hurt worse than if she had smacked me with the entire tree. They sting your skin just enough to make those crocodile tears well up in your eyes. What hurt worse than the switch? My mother telling me she's disappointed.

Oh man. How can a child ever recover from a comment like that?

Later on, she realizes she has no proof so she doesn't punish me further (after all, my mother is fair). When my sister comes home, mom lets her know what's going on, as if the disappointment of one family member wasn't enough.

Let me rewind here a bit. The "old house" was next to the apartment building. The supermarket called "Red Apple" was in front of our apartment building. (this piece of information is important)

Okay, continuing the story. Mom tells Manuela that I was smoking and that she caught me. Manuela smiles because she already knew it. They discuss the story and it goes something like this:

Mom: Did you know your little sister has been smoking?

Manuela: Had no idea.

Mom: I caught her and her little friend behind the supermarket.

Manuela: Really? The supermarket, Gabi? (turns and looks at me)

Mom: Yeah! I don't know where she got the cigarettes. She must have taken them from me. But the supermarket. Everyone will see her and then what will people say?

Manuela:... (just stares at me)

THE INJUSTICE!!!! She was telling my sister the story wrong. Not behind the supermarket. How dare she get the most important day of my rebellious life wrong? The first time I did something to get punished for and my mother MESSES up the story? Of course, the conversation between them continued for another 5-10 minutes about me smoking behind the supermarket.

And before I knew it, my mouth opened and it formed words.  "I WAS NOT SMOKING BEHIND THE SUPERMARKET. I WAS SMOKING ON THE BALCONY OF THE OLD HOUSE!!!"

Mom and Manuela: (are now dying of laughter because I have told on myself)

She didn't punish me. She was laughing too hard.

Mom: 1                  Gabi: 0


Great memory!

Day 17: Favorite photo

Day 17: A favorite photo of yourself and why

Whoa! What do we have to say about this photo!? The reason it's my favorite photo is because I look like I have no cares in the world. I have, what I'm assuming, Nutella on my face. I am in my pajamas. The plastic sandals are on the feet which means I am about to head to the beach with the parents. This pictures just depicts my personality 100%. I love Nutella. I love the beach. If I could walk around in my pajamas all day, I would.

Now let me tell you a little about myself. I am very lazy when I want to be. I also love to relax and take time for myself. I love being on the beach and in cities where the beach affects the weather. I love being in comfortable clothing because it doesn't restrict any movement. My enjoyment is photography; taking pictures as well as having others take pictures of me. So this picture, voila! ME!

I miss my childhood. The most beautiful days of my life were spent with my family on vacations in Croatia as well living there. This is where it all started. Creation of my character and personality. Croatia. The beautiful Croatia. 

Today was fun. <3

Day 16: Lot in life

Day 16: Something difficult about your "lot in life" and how you're working to overcome it

Some of these subjects on this 31 Blog Challenge really hit close to home.

My stepdad died in March. I don't deal with death well anyways, but seeing that person go through so much, suffer and then die? You can never be the same again. He and I weren't really close to begin with. He was stubborn as hell and I am, well, me..just as stubborn and hardheaded. He was one of the strongest people I knew. He was a fighter, but to see him succumb to his illness was one of the worst things I have been through in my life.

To this day, 6 months later, it still affects me. I have nightmares. I can't sleep at night. I think about him during the day. I cry. I mourn. I remember his pain. I remember his tears. I remember his screams and the agony of pain that he was in. I watch his death continue to affect those I love. Life does go on, but it's never going to be the same again. 

A couple of weeks ago, I woke up not being able to breathe. My dreams brought back all of the suffering and the pain that I watched him go through. I won't describe what all that was. It's too much for anyone to read or be able to handle. The only ones that truly know the torturous battle are my brother, sisters and mom. They will not speak of it either. That pain is mine to bear. Those images are mine to have. No one can take that away from me and no one can make it seem any easier. I cried like I never have before. I was angry. I'm still angry.

With each month that passes, I learn to deal with it better. Death is a part of life. That's the vicious circle that each of us have accepted.


Day 16..done.


P.S. Also, check out my blog idol!!!

Day 15: Day in the life

Day 15: A Day in the life (include photos from throughout your typical day - this could be "a photo an hour" if you'd like)

6:30am- Waking up and dreading getting up

7:00am- Coming to work

7:15am- Coffee and cigarette time

7:30am- Doing some actual work

8am- Snack time

9:30am/10am- Smoke break and play with the kitty cat we have outside, then back to work.

11:00am- Lunch time- which means this goes on for an hour about where we're eating, who is paying and who is going to go get it

12:00pm- Actual lunch time

12:30pm-Smoke break and kitty cat again. Then dread going back to work, because lunch makes me sleepy. And I really want to continue playing with the kitty.

3pm- OFF WORK!

4pm- Taking Anna to the chiropractor

5pm- GYM TIME WITH THE ROOMIE!!!

7pm/8pm- Home to take a shower

9pm/10pm- Sleepy land

Pretty boring life, but it suits me and so far I love it.

Day 14: Ten things to make you happy

Day 14: Ten things that make you really happy

• Traveling
• Losing weight and getting fit
• Tattoos
• Love
• Family
• Friends
• Animals
• Paying off my bills
• Shopping
• My new car

Day 13: Public apology

Day 13: Issue a public apology. This can be as funny or as serious or as creative as you want it to be.

I am sorry I am different. I am sorry I am not married or pregnant. I am sorry I have two degrees and have decided to make a life for myself before bringing a life onto this planet. I'm sorry I won't just trust anyone to make a child with me. I'm sorry I won't trust just anyone with the sanctity of marriage. I'm sorry I believe marriage is a choice, not a necessity. 

I am sorry things in my life don't concern you. I am sorry you're bitter. I'm sorry you're unhappy. I am sorry your husband cheats on you or your wife cheats on you and the only question out of your mouth is concerned with my life.

I'm sorry my concern is making myself happy instead of worrying about making someone else happy. I'm sorry my only problems in life right now are where I'm partying this weekend. I'm sorry you have to find a babysitter and I can live my life freely.

I'm sorry I'm open minded and I support gay marriage. I'm sorry I don't judge people by their color like you do. I'm sorry I support anyone who practices religion even if their religion is different from mine. 

I'm sorry I'm tolerant of a lot of things and you can't be. I'm sorry I don't have a temper and I know how to keep quiet. I'm sorry I know which battles to fight.

I'm sorry you're stupid, but God can't let too much intelligent life onto this Earth or we may just figure out where shit is going wrong.


Anyways. I'm not sorry for day 13. Haha! On to the next day!

Day 12: What do you miss?

Day 12: What do you miss? (a person, a thing, a place, a time of your life...)

Oh, we are about to get sad and misty eyed here folks. Just a fair warning.

I miss my family members that have passed. My grandmother (2002), my uncle (2008), my grandpa (2010) and my step-dad (2013).

I miss being a kid again. I miss Croatia. My childhood was amazing after we left the war-torn Bosnia in 1995. We moved to Croatia to live with my dad and for the first time in a long time, I felt like I was part of a family. 

We had breakfast, lunch and dinner together. I had help with my homework. They encouraged me to do my best. I had support. I had love. I had consistency. I really miss those days. I spent more time outside playing hide and seek than anywhere else. When I was bored, the beach was a 5 minute walk downhill. When I wanted to travel, I hopped on a bus and went to the nearest big city to shop with my friends or alone. 

I went into "town" for ice cream. I remember having school from 8am-2pm one week, then the next week from 12pm-7pm and it was alternated between two weeks of those hours. I miss "tople sendvice"- warm, toasted sandwiches from the kiosk behind the school. Those were amazing. I still remember how they taste..even 16 years later.

I miss the smell of the ocean and the feeling of the pebbles and rocks underneath my feet as I walked on the beach. I miss the smell of the morning breeze when we ate breakfast on the terrace. I miss my childhood friends and our innocence.

For a kid that constantly feared for her life for three years, Croatia became a place of refuge. It became my safe haven. It became home.


Anyways. Now that I am an emotional mess, on to day 13!

Day 11: Sell yourself

Day 11: Sell yourself in 10 words or less

Open-minded

What ^^ says

Financially- responsible

This is a rare occurrence nowadays

Very.

Unique.

I'm freaking hilarious!

To the deserving, yes.

Last but not least..Emphatic.

Day 10: Most embarrassing moment

Day 10: Most embarrassing moment (s). Spill.

Geez, I don’t have many of these moments in my life. I don’t get embarrassed really easily. I guess I have no shame.

Okay. 

I guess I have to come up with the only scenario I got. My ex-boyfriend and I went swimming at the lake. We are both smokers so after we dried off, we sat on the wooden bench for a cigarette. At this point, we have been together for about a year and a half. We were pretty comfortable with each other, but not too comfortable.

We sat on the bench and had a full blown conversation over a cigarette. Then I felt the most horrific pain in my stomach. The kind that can only come from one need and that is the need to fart. I knew I couldn't let him know that something was wrong, because as caring as he was at that time he would try to make me feel better and the only way to do that was to get 100 feet away from me and just let me do my business.

He kept at the conversation while I died a little inside with each and every word. I decided that maybe a different position would relieve the tension from the stomach and make me focus on reality instead of the atomic gases that were forming inside my stomach. I wriggled, and scooted down the bench. I moved side to side in the most lady like manner. I even, at some point, squeezed my butt cheeks so tight just to be able to get up and re-position my body, that I thought it was the end of me.

Nothing helped.

Finally, when it all became too much, I decided to excuse myself. Of course, because we have been swimming, I was wearing a bathing suit that at this point was jammed so far up the crack of my ass because of all my undisclosed Matrix moves. I had to get it out before I actually stood up. I leaned to one side, grabbed my bathing suit and pulled.

And there she blows. The fart that was heard across the world. Not only was the sound so loud coming out of me, but because we were on a wooden bench, it echoed and vibrated. I was never more mortified in my life.

His reaction: priceless.

And now that I feel like I'm so much more closer to you guys, on to the next day.

Day 9: Your 5 senses

Day 9: Your 5 senses right now

I feel: the keyboard keys under my fingertips

I hear: the people in my office talking

I see: the computer screen and the rim of my glasses

I smell: my boss smoking in the other room (pardon while I go yell at him)

I taste: Bosnian coffee..yum!

Short but sweet blog post today!

Also, since this blog post fell on this day: Never Forget 9/11!!! Say a prayer for the victims' families and friends because 12 years later and I guarantee you, this day to them feels like only yesterday.

Day 8: And the lottery winner is...

Day 8: If you won the lottery…

This subject gets me so freakin’ excited because I always talk about what I would do if I won the lottery or found a large sum of money. I’d be boring and responsible as hell at first. I thought about marrying for money once. That’s another story though.

Hmmm! If I won the lottery today which is calculated at 169 million dollars, the first thing I would do is pay off all my debt. Of course the 169 million dollars would be taxed and taxed until I would have only about 80 or less to take home. So let’s say I got 80 mill out of the bunch.

$80,000,000

- college loans (70k roughly)

- mom’s house (100k roughly)

- Anna’s college fund (1 mil for college, housing, expenses for whatever under the condition that she has a part time job)

- Buy mom a new car (30k)

- Give dad money (500k)

- Give my nephews money (100k x2= 200k)

- Clear my credit history (3k)

- Pay off my car (13k)

- Trips to Cancun, Croatia and Bosnia with the BFF (roughly 50k for trips and shopping)

- Buy a house (200k)

- Travel the world (200k)

- place 77 mil in savings and investments

__________________________

= $634,000

See? Told you. Boring at first.

Enough of dreaming. Back to reality and on to the next day!