Blog Day 3- A book you love

Hello Day 3!

Well, how did you know I was a reader, Day 3?

I'm glad you ask because I LOVE TO READ! The topic is "A book you love" and I love all of them, so it's hard to pick just one. There are a few books that come to mind when the topic comes up though and they are:

- Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom...I was in the 9th or 10th grade (can't remember-I've killed a few  lot of brain cells since then) and I remember getting this book assigned to us as a class project. We were supposed to read a few chapters a day, and then do a worksheet answering certain questions or summarizing what we read; you know the drill. All I remember is I picked up this book and didn't set it down. It just captured my attention and made me cry several times. I love books that are able to touch your emotions as if it were happening to you.

- Lord of the Rings Trilogy by J.R.R. Tolkien...I read this book (I had the three books in one) faster than I've read anything in my life. Then I read it again, slower this time, really taking in the scenery it was depicting and the stories of each character. I obsessed over LOTR so much that I even had a guild on an online game I was playing at the time called "Lords of the Ring". And then the movies were made; I watched all of them several times!!


And today, my dear readers, the status of my reading? It's been a while since I've finished a book. I keep thinking I'll read when I work less, when I have more time, when I have more motivation to do things, when I get a boyfriend so we can be "that" couple, when "insert excuse here"- I've started reading several and haven't finished one. Life happens and my concentration is at a -10 anyway, so my book reading has dropped off my list of things to do. I promise, as soon as my brain quietens down and I can breathe again, I'll read again, too. 

Blog Day 2- Something you feel strongly about

Well, hello Day 2! I didn't think you were going to be jumping into deep topics this quickly, but OKURRR. Something I feel strongly about: Equality. For all people. No matter what race, nationality, religion, creed or tribe.
I dislike grouping people that are minorities already starting from below zero into sections of land and holding them down even further. I dislike hearing that a gun was pulled just because someone was black or because someone chose to pay bills by being a police officer. I dislike seeing someone disregard another as a person because they are wearing a *burka or because they chose to believe in God in another form.

I never understood how someone could have so much hate in their own heart to be able to hate someone else they don't even know..just for the fact that they are different from them. This isn't something I should be even talking about. It angers me that we live in a world where equality is a topic even needing to be discussed. It should be freely given. It should be a solid right. Your right to be equal. It should. It's not the same for everyone. We all live in a different America!!

Blog Day 1- Five ways to win your heart

Hello, my dear readers. It's been a while. Life has been on the up and up lately in most areas and down in others. That is to be expected because...life. It would be boring otherwise and as cliche as it sounds, I just take it day by day. Anyway, I decided a little while back that I was going to do a blog challenge and here it is. Day 1. I am trying to get back to my writing because I have been gone for so long and my block feels like it has been lifted to a point.

Eventually we will get into the daily gripes and conversations, but for right now the topic is "Five ways to win your heart"? So, I am thinking this post could go two ways. I can share the five ways to win my heart or I can emphasize five "ways" that should be taught to little boys in order to win a woman's heart. Period.

Well, if we are talking about my heart, that is in a lot of places lately. All good, no complaints here. I am content with the way my heart life is going. Both literally and figuratively speaking, that is. Wink wink, nudge nudge. And if we are talking about the five ways that should be taught is simple. Teach them chivalry, integrity, kindness, empathy and responsibility. The end.

As for mine..

1. Pay attention
2. Acknowledge my furry kiddos
3. Plan a date
4. Kindness
5. Honesty

Because I don't know what to say lately

Okay-ish

So, hello 2018. It's nice to have you. You've been with us for about 3 months now, and as far as I'm concerned, you can slow down a little. Kick your feet up, stay a while. You're passing me up quickly and I have so many life decisions to make keep refusing to make. It's not fair how some years are begged to go on forever while some you pray would go at lightning speed. I'm not sure how to feel about you yet, so stick around.

Well guys, I used to update you all about my life constantly, but I am not really sure anyone reads this blog anymore. I've kept you entertained with my antics and my dark humor. I've shared my student teaching festivities as well as many posts griping about random topics that interest a handful of people. I've tried to make you laugh, make you think, make you even shed a few tears and now I'm not sure where to go with this blog from here. I'm not even sure whether to keep it. I guess this post is a cry of help from a writer who has developed a block, and not just in the writing department.


To update a little bit for the few of you who may care and don't know. I used to do the job, friends, love, family update so I might as well keep up with the blog traditions and continue. I've changed jobs. I no longer work in the trucking industry and in some ways, it's a blessing. No more unset or vague rules, no more bosses instead of leaders, no more policies that just don't benefit anyone but the ones making money. I have not always had such aversion for the transportation industry; it's more developed in this last year when the flood came. I now work in the HR Department at Lowe's. I'm still new and learning, but it's a new adventure.


I've made some new friends, as well as kept more in touch with my old ones. Since the end of 2017 and beginning of 2018, it seems like the floods came for a few of us. Keeping in touch for us doesn't just mean over social media with a few likes and heart eyes emojis on some pictures. I mean, kept in real touch..real world communication such as text messages, phone calls, video chats, visits, etc. I appreciate it all, but I definitely appreciate any of the above more when it was unexpected.


Oh love, where art thou? Bueller? Bueller?...Anyone? Oh wait. No. See, I have a theory about this. Every time I have an interest, it's with someone who is just unattainable. Whether he is physically, emotionally or mentally unattainable, it makes him not able to continue in the proceedings of being hired on as my future anything. And for some reason, God likes to play jokes on me so he magnetizes these men and make me be a part of this magnetism, so that a particular man finds me and then proceeds to waste my time. Yes, I voluntarily do this and blame no one, but I've wisened up.  I've had some laughs. Now it's time to get serious. So, love department, you ask? Closed until further notice. I had a few glimmers of hope, but then I realized...


Family. 2018 has been fun so far and is about to be even more fun. Anna is having surgery in June on her back and mom spent a week in the hospital with staph and pneumonia. Big sis is building a house; I am beyond excited for her and her family. Brother is always brother. We're all making it in some way.


Short and sweet, I used to have a lot to say; I was an open book. Lately, I prefer to be a diary. Only a few get to read and only the ones willing to pick it up for the long term read. Toodles!

Inspiration

I am thinking it may be time for another 30 day blog challenge. I don't have the inspiration or the motivation lately to write. I am going through a lot here in the real world. I feel like I finally have my feelings on the right track with the right people. I'm more productive at work, so I am busier. I also am having health issues which I do not want to speak about just yet. No, I am not dying...not that I know of. My blog world used to be an escape but since I am kind of at a standstill, I have nothing to rant about.
I am waiting for something to inspire me in life, I guess. I feel like when women are in love, they blossom. The open up to new ideas, they become more caring and sensitive, but they also become more vulnerable. When they travel, they become more open-minded and worldly and that is a beautiful characteristic to have. I have not traveled lately and even though I am dating, I am currently not in love. So, I need to create my own inspiration. Not exactly sure where I should start. 
I will sit down and write a nice bucket list. Again. This time I am going to publish it here so you guys can keep me motivated. I would also like to ask you guys when you read this blog, to contact me. Message me, text me, email me, Facebook me, ...whatever..but I want you guys to tell me what I should add to my bucket list. Of course, I will look over every suggestion and take the ones that apply to me. For example, I have acrophobia (fear of heights) so if you tell me to get on a famous roller coaster somewhere, I probably will be unable to cross it off my list. So beauties and beasts, get on it. 

Day 31: Memory

Day 31: A vivid memory

My memories recently are not the greatest things in the world because so much bad has happened in such a short time that the only thing I remember are the sad moments.

I have many memories I can remember but none are really worth blogging about and some are kind of private. I feel like if you guys are going to keep reading I need to keep it PG-13 up in this bitch. By saying bitch, it's totally not PG-13 anymore, but who cares? If I think really hard about it, I can at least come up with one.

I remember the day I arrived in Spain. I was up all night. I just couldn't sleep. I was so excited to make my dream come true.

I picked up my packed belongings from my sister's bedroom floor and on my step-dad and I went. He drove me and of course lectured me for the hour drive about how to be safe abroad in a foreign country. I kept thinking "wait, we are foreign as well. I'll be fine," but he kept talking so I kept listening.

I arrived at the airport and met with my group of friends.You can see the scared looks on our faces but we were keeping them at bay. We were too excited. Whatever happens, happens. We marched forward through security and settled in at the gate.

We boarded the plane and after a LONG trip, we landed in Barcelona. The moment the double doors opened and I exited the airport, I took a deep breath of the fresh Barcelona air and fell in love. It was the best experience of my life.
After we got off the plane, we took a bus to La Garriga where we would be staying. It was a small, little town outside of Barcelona but it had such personality.

the train station in La Garriga

I will never forget the ice cream bought in this train station. My trip to Paris started with this train station and ended in the best 4 days of my life. I'll never forget the walk up the hill to get here and going through the market on Saturdays. I'll never forget my friend Tariq walking with me at 5am to the train station before my trip to see my father.
I will never forget Barcelona. It is engraved into me. Into my heart. Barcelona helped make me who I am today. It gave me the strength when I didn't think I could go on anymore. I will go there again. I will fall in love again. I will breathe the fresh ocean air again.

Christopher Columbus statue at the end of La Rambla

a little alley off of La Rambla

Gaudi building

Barcelona port

Another Gaudi artwork

Barcelona port

Sagrada Familia

Me on the top of Sagrada Familia

Santa Maria del Mar Cathedral

Park Guell

View from Park Guell

Day 30: Letting go

Day 30: React to this term: Letting Go

It means being strong enough. It means releasing the stuff from your life that doesn't affect you positively or make you grow as a person. It means breathing in the good and releasing the bad. Letting go isn't always a bad thing.

But nevertheless, It's the toughest thing to do and regardless of how strong you are, it will change you. There are many things you can let go of. Relationships, friendships, people, family, job, issues, baggage, grudges. You can also let go of the good in your life because you aren't ready for it.

For me, it means peace. Not peace at first, but peace in the long run. No more worries, no more problems, no more troubles. I wish I knew how to, but I don't. I have never let go of anything; time has just made me think of it less. I regret things, I'm still mad at certain people, I still hold grudges..I just found ways not to think a lot about them.

That doesn't sound healthy, does it? It's not. It tears me apart every day but the more I let it out daily, the more it leaves my mind and it takes it a longer time to come back to haunt me. That's one of the reasons I started this blog. My friends love me and want to hear it, but not every day and not when their lives are doing well or when they're having a bad day.

My blog has saved my life. Many times. I know not many people read it, but the few of you that do, are my blessings. And this blog..is my therapy from the world.

What does letting go mean for you at this moment in your life?

Day 29: Music is a way of life

Day 29: Five songs or pieces of music that speak to you or bring back memories. Use Grooveshark or YouTube to include them in the post



Avicii- Wake me up

Avicii- I could be the one

Guns N Roses- November rain

Metallica- Nothing else matters

Christina Aguilera- Save me from myself

I won't elaborate why I love these songs, or why they affect me. My heart is too heavy lately. If you feel like asking, please do it in a private message or email me. I can talk about my feelings for days, so get ready.

Day 29. I love music.

Day 28: Pictures

Day 28: Only pictures

Day 27: A letter to you guys, my readers

Day 27: A letter to your readers

My dear readers,

I want to let you know that I am truly grateful for every written word that you have read. It means so much to me; I can't even explain. You encourage me to write more and I hope I encourage you to seek ways to explain and communicate yourself as well. The only way in this world that we differ from animals is that we can talk. We have the ability to express ourselves, our pain, our happiness and any other emotion that we may feel. We have the ability to make the world a better place for our future generations and we have the ability to be great every single day that we wake up. 

If you guys ever decide to blog, know that you have a number one fan. Me! Let me know your link and I will read it and give you pointers. I'm not amazing at blogging like some people, but I can give you pointers. I would love it if someone paid me to drink coffee and blog from home, but we all know that will never happen. Maybe I can be a stay-at-home-mom...without the mom part. Haha who am I kidding? I'd get bored in a week after rearranging my house a bagillion times and then go out drinking.

My family doesn't really follow me on here. My older sister may have read a few, a few friends read it when I write something interesting. The few of you that read my blog religiously know parts of me that I don't tell a lot of people. That's because this blog is my cover. This blog is my safety net and also this blog stops me from smacking the shit out of people and going to jail. 

Thank you. I can never say it enough. Thank you for being here. Thank you for reading. Thank you for asking me questions, giving me things to blog about and giving me feedback.

I would also like to thank some of you for being complete and utter fucktards and giving me something to bitch about.

I love you all. <3

Day 26: I read this today and...

Day 26: Something you read online. Leave a link and discuss, if you'd like.

This is one of the best articles I have read in a really long time. I won't discuss it. I just want you guys to read it because it's in depth and it explains everything. It's also amazing and life-changing.

"The covers of most men's and women's magazines have similar headlines: "Get Great Abs" and "Have Amazing Sex."

From the looks of it, these two issues have been recycled over and over (with some other stereotypically gender-relevant articles thrown in) on every Men's Health, Maxim,Cosmopolitan and Glamour cover since the dawn of time. In fact, I'd bet that if we could get a better translation of cave drawings, they would read something like "Grok get flat belly. Make girl Grok moan with joy."

And we keep buying them. We keep buying this lie that these things will make us happy. I've had washboard abs (past tense) and I've had some pretty phenomenal sex. Neither one made me a better person. Neither one completed me or made my life more fulfilling.

We chase this idea of "I will be happy when... "

I will be happy when I have a new car. I will be happy when I get married. I will be happy when I get a better job. I will be happy when I lose five pounds. What if instead we choose to be happy -- right now?

If you can read this, your life is pretty awesome.

Setting aside our first-world problems and pettiness, if you are online reading this, you have both electricity and WiFi or access to them. Odds are you are in a shelter of some sort, or on a smart phone (and then kudos to you for reading this on the go). Life might bump and bruise us, it may not always go the way we plan and I know I get frustrated with mine, but here's the thing: You are alive.

Because you are alive, everything is possible. So about those eight tips...

1. Stop believing your bullshit.

All that stuff you tell yourself about how you are a commitment phobe or a coward or lazy or not creative or unlucky? Stop it. It's bullshit, and deep down you know it. We are all insecure 14 year olds at heart. We're all scared. We all have dreams inside of us that we've tucked away because somewhere along the line we tacked on those ideas about who we are that buried that essential brilliant, childlike sense of wonder. The more we stick to these scripts about who we are, the longer we live a fraction of the life we could be living. Let it go. Be who you are beneath the bullshit.

2. Be happy now.

Not because The Secret says so. Not because of some shiny happy Oprah crap. But because we can choose to appreciate what is in our lives instead of being angry or regretful about what we lack. It's a small, significant shift in perspective. It's easier to look at what's wrong or missing in our lives and believe that is the big picture -- but it isn't. We can choose to let the beautiful parts set the tone.

3. Look at the stars.

It won't fix the economy. It won't stop wars. It won't give you flat abs, or better sex or even help you figure out your relationship and what you want to do with your life. But it's important. It helps you remember that you and your problems are both infinitesimally small and conversely, that you are a piece of an amazing and vast universe. I do it daily -- it helps.

4. Let people in.

Truly. Tell people that you trust when you need help, or you're depressed -- or you're happy and you want to share it with them. Acknowledge that you care about them and let yourself feel it. Instead of doing that other thing we sometimes do, which is to play it cool and pretend we only care as much as the other person has admitted to caring, and only open up half way. Go all in -- it's worth it.

5. Stop with the crazy making.

I got to a friend's doorstep the other day, slightly breathless and nearly in tears after getting a little lost, physically and existentially. She asked what was wrong and I started to explain and then stopped myself and admitted, "I'm being stupid and have decided to invent lots of problems in my head." Life is full of obstacles; we don't need to create extra ones. Don't take things personally. Most of the time, other people's choices and attitudes have absolutely nothing to do with you. Unless you've been behaving like a jerk, in which case...

6. Learn to apologize.
Not the ridiculous, self-deprecating apologizing for who you are and for existing that some people seem to do (what's up with that, anyway?). The ability to sincerely apologize -- without ever interjecting the word "but" -- is an essential skill for living around other human beings. If you are going to be around other people, eventually you will need to apologize. It's an important practice.

7. Practice gratitude.

Practice it out loud to the people around you. Practice it silently when you bless your food. Practice it often. Gratitude is not a first world only virtue. I saw a photo recently, of a girl in abject poverty, surrounded by filth and destruction. Her face was completely lit up with joy and gratitude as she played with a hula hoop she'd been given. Gratitude is what makes what we have enough. Gratitude is the most basic way to connect with that sense of being an integral part of the vastness of the universe; as I mentioned with looking up at the stars, it's that sense of wonder and humility, contrasted with celebrating our connection to all of life.

8. Be kind.

Kurt Vonnegut said it best (though admittedly, and somewhat ashamedly -- I am not a Vonnegut fan): "There's only one rule that I know of, babies -- 'God damn it, you've got to be kind.'"

Kindness costs us nothing and pays exponential dividends. I can't save the whole world. I can't bring peace to Syria. I can't fix the environment or the health care system, and from the looks of it, I may end up burning my dinner.

But I can be kind.

If the biggest thing we do in life is to extend love and kindness to even one other human being, we have changed the world for the better.

That's a hell of a lot more important than flat abs in my book."

Like I said..AMAZING read!

Day 25: Let me tell you about you

Day 25: Something someone told you about yourself that you'll never forget (good or bad)

Before I was born, my mom had a neighbor who she absolutely loved. They had coffee every day. They were really good friends. Mom was pregnant at the time with me and Mira would often help out.

Then I was born. The first time Mira laid eyes on me, she studied me and my face for a while and then told my mother I was the next Socrates. My mother smiled and took the compliment, but she didn't really believe how true that was until I started speaking.

The first time mom told me this story was in Junior High when I felt different than everyone else. The girls were chasing boys, the boys were chasing the girls and all I was worried about was saving the world.

As I grew, I looked at everything with such depth. I always asked why and often researched to find the answers. My friends always knew that they could come to me with any situation because I could see both points of view and would be of great benefit with advice.

I often bear the burden of being a thinker. Sometimes it would just be easier to be stupid. It would be easier to watch the news and go along with any bullshit the government feeds us. It would be easier to be in relationships, to hear the lies and deceit and still believe that person. It would be easier to manage friendships and to have a job. Life is much easier when you're stupid; ignorance is bliss.


I believe that woman cursed me. May she rest in peace.

Day 24: Worst traits

Day 24: Your top 3 worst traits

As much as I don't really want to blog today...Here it is.

1. Stubbornness (ask my mother)
2. Indecisiveness (just ask where I want to eat and you'll see)
3. Understanding (I've been understanding for far too long and the only person that ever gets hurts by it, is me. Sometimes I'd like to just say "I don't fucking care about your problems" and be selfish..too bad that's not who I am)

Short but sweet day. I have many bad traits and every single one I know and acknowledge. I am not afraid of my own shadow. I am able to admit my bad qualities and live with them. I don't have anything to hide. Ever.

Day 23: School doesn't teach

Day 23: Things you've learned that school won't teach you

School will teach you how to read and write but will not teach you to understand.

School will teach you how to share your crayons and work in a group, but will not teach you compassion and caring.

School will teach you what to do in your career, but it will not teach you how to keep a job.

School doesn't teach you how to party, how to love, how to cure a broken heart or even how to not freak out when something goes wrong with your car.

I've learned how to be tolerant of others even when they dry hump my last nerve. I've learned how to speak my mind and develop my own individual style. I've learned that high school and college are nothing like real life. I've learned the world is really as cold as we all think it is. I've learned that people deal with tough situations every day. I've learned that after a fall, sometimes you gotta stay down until you are ready to stand up again. I've learned motivational quotes are just words until you give them power. I've learned the only person that will never betray you doesn't exist; even the person in the mirror gives up on you sometimes.


I've learned how to live for myself; how to provide for, nurture and take care of me.

Life isn't a race. There isn't a number one spot. Slow down, breathe and take everything day by day, moment by moment. Don't worry about the past. It's already gone. Don't worry about the future. It hasn't even come here yet. Worry about today.


Thanks, Day 23. I wish you could do magic things like erase people from my life.

Day 22: My soapbox

Day 22: Rant about something. Get up on your soapbox and tell us how you really feel. (a pet peeve, a current event, a controversial topic, something your husband or roommate or neighbor or boss does that really ticks you off)

This isn't safe. Asking me what bothers me is like poking a lion with a stick when you don't have a fence in between you. It's dangerous and you will get eaten alive.

I will not talk politics, because that just pisses me off. I will not talk controversial topics, because that just makes me want to go change the world.

My pet peeve right now is people asking me when I am going to get married. First of all, just because you got trapped, doesn't mean you have to ask when others will be joining you. Second of all, marriage is a big deal to me. I won't do it because someone tells me I can't. I won't do it because I feel sorry for the person I'm with. I won't do it for convenience or any kind of underlying interest. I won't do it if I am not 100% sure. Third of all, finding someone that you think possess that kind of forever love? Impossible.

No, guys, seriously I'm fine. Stop asking! I enjoy my life. I go out when I want to. I drink. I stay out late. I don't have to worry about cooking for anyone. My apartment stays clean. I don't have to pick up anyone else's shit. I do laundry only for me. I wash dishes when I want to. You know what's sweeter than the sound of a child's laughter? The sound of silence from not having any fucking kids.

Don't get me wrong. I absolutely adore kids. I have a married couple that I sometimes hang out with and I absolutely love them. They have two kids, and every time we go over there, their kids are always in my lap or around me waiting for me to read books, play with them, or just generally talk to them. I, never for one minute, found them annoying or wanted them to go away. I absolutely adore their children. They're so much fun and they are so interesting.

Also, did you forget I went to school to be an elementary school teacher?? So, yeah, I love kids. I want kids, just not now. Maybe not ever. Maybe I just want to adore your child and then go the fuck home! Who knows!? Who cares?! It's my life.

It's called knowing what you want and I want to be selfish. I don't want a husband to tell me what to do. I don't want to feel tied down. I don't want to learn how to cook yet. I don't want to lose my identity. I want to travel, enjoy my life, drink, party and not have a care in the world.

So the next time you ask me "when am I getting married", I'll politely smile and ask "when are you getting divorced?"


<3

Day 21: Favorite blog posts

Day 21: A list of links to your favorite posts in your archives

SPAIN!!!!

Day 2 in Spain

We never get there

Baring my soul

My mother

Life in a shit town

HERBIE!!!

Romance

Day 20: Real talk

Day 20: Get real. Share something you're struggling with right now.

I struggle with a lot on a daily basis. I already talked about my step-dad. That's a huge struggle every day, all day. 

Another thing I struggle with is the urge to travel. On one hand, I am saving money and paying off all my debt one by one, but there is a small flame inside me that is pushing me to say "screw it" and go on a two week vacation to Cancun or Hawaii or somewhere exotic where I don't know anyone.

It's hard feeling like you aren't living your life to the fullest because you are counting days to that paycheck or because you are more focused on responsibilities rather than living.

There is one quote that's always stuck in my head and I use it often. "Don't let making a living prevent you from making a life."

I know this isn't a huge battle but it's big to me. One day I will eventually fly away.. 

One day..

Day 19: IPOD shuffle

Day 19: Put your IPOD on shuffle and list 10 songs as they play

Since I am Bosnian, I am going to have to cheat here and just post the 10 American songs for you guys!

1. Pitbull- Back in time

2. Hot Chelle Rae- I like it like that

3. Mickey Avalon- Jane Fonda

4. Sia- Breathe me

5. Ginuwine- Pony

6. Tech N9ne- Midwest Choppers

7. Cascada- Evacuate the dance floor

8. Seether- Careless Whisper

9. Seether ft. Amy Lee- Broken

10. B.o.B.- Airplanes

Day 18: Childhood story

Day 18: Tell a story from your childhood. Dig deep and try to be descriptive about what you remember and how you felt.

My most remembered memory is when my mother caught me smoking. Right next to the apartment buildings where all of my friends and I lived, we had an old abandoned old house that was destroyed during the war. The only thing left of the house was the outside skeleton. My friend and I stole a couple of cigarettes from our mothers, cause we thought we were the shit and they'd never find out. We went into the old house, and climbed up the stairs to the second floor balcony. The balcony didn't have any bars so it was completely open, but if you sat up against the wall, no one from the bottom could see you.

But they could hear you..

Here comes my mother screaming out my name. Standing downstairs trying to catch a peek of the upstairs balcony. She hears me. I know she does because all I hear is "Gabriela, I know you're up there" and a few choice Bosnian cuss words. So, Gorana and I put out our cigarettes. We put gum in our mouths and we walked downstairs cool, calm and collected. Nothing happened. We weren't doing anything wrong.

Prove it!!!

My mother grabs my arm, and drags me home. On the way up to our apartment, she is smacking my legs with the smallest switch (little, tiny, skiny branch of a tree) she could find. Those hurt worse than if she had smacked me with the entire tree. They sting your skin just enough to make those crocodile tears well up in your eyes. What hurt worse than the switch? My mother telling me she's disappointed.

Oh man. How can a child ever recover from a comment like that?

Later on, she realizes she has no proof so she doesn't punish me further (after all, my mother is fair). When my sister comes home, mom lets her know what's going on, as if the disappointment of one family member wasn't enough.

Let me rewind here a bit. The "old house" was next to the apartment building. The supermarket called "Red Apple" was in front of our apartment building. (this piece of information is important)

Okay, continuing the story. Mom tells Manuela that I was smoking and that she caught me. Manuela smiles because she already knew it. They discuss the story and it goes something like this:

Mom: Did you know your little sister has been smoking?

Manuela: Had no idea.

Mom: I caught her and her little friend behind the supermarket.

Manuela: Really? The supermarket, Gabi? (turns and looks at me)

Mom: Yeah! I don't know where she got the cigarettes. She must have taken them from me. But the supermarket. Everyone will see her and then what will people say?

Manuela:... (just stares at me)

THE INJUSTICE!!!! She was telling my sister the story wrong. Not behind the supermarket. How dare she get the most important day of my rebellious life wrong? The first time I did something to get punished for and my mother MESSES up the story? Of course, the conversation between them continued for another 5-10 minutes about me smoking behind the supermarket.

And before I knew it, my mouth opened and it formed words.  "I WAS NOT SMOKING BEHIND THE SUPERMARKET. I WAS SMOKING ON THE BALCONY OF THE OLD HOUSE!!!"

Mom and Manuela: (are now dying of laughter because I have told on myself)

She didn't punish me. She was laughing too hard.

Mom: 1                  Gabi: 0


Great memory!