I'm officially a loser!!!

Dear bloggers!
Yup, you heard it here first. I'm a loser! I lost 4 lbs!!! I know it's a slow progress. It means it's 1 lb a week, but anything is better than nothing. I have been going to the gym 5 days a week for about an hour or so. I feel a lot better! Also, I have noticed that my lovely behind is getting tighter! My thighs are looking better as well. I still haven't quite figured out how to eat healthy as I'd like to, but I am staying within my calories and all that so I'm not doing too badly with the food that I am currently accustomed to eating. Everything is moderation. Anyway, since I haven't blogged, I could do my regular update on life.

Job: Still love it!
Friends: Need more of them!
Love: It'll come!

Toodles!!

You will either be sore for today, or sorry for today

Bloggers! I have lost half an inch in my waist. I know that is not much, but I am flippin' excited. Seems like whatever I am doing is working and I intend on making myself a health nut. I'll be a good one, I'm OCD already! :) I have friends support on MFP (not in real life), and that's OK. The only person that needs to believe in me is ME! I love my friends, but sometimes they can be real downers when it comes to what I'm doing. I had a cheat day yesterday. Went to dinner with a friend, but still logged everything the way it was supposed to be. Went over my calories, but 167 calories for great food, great wine and great company every once in a while, I'm perfectly OK with. :)
Anyway, I wish I had more people that want to do this with me. I am so excited about losing weight, it's unreal. It's been a while since I have updated about life.

Life- is OK. I am trying to get all of my things back in order.
Friends- don't see them as much. Busy with the above mentioned.
Love- All of my friends are getting married; I am 26 and drunk. :)

No loss..yet

Dear bloggers, I haven't written for about a week and a half now. I have been exercising regularly, 5 days a week. I am determined to lose weight, feel and look better so my goals in life are achieved by a new me. The old me is starting to get tired of this world and its shenanigans. Anyway, I have not lost any weight yet. I am still waiting to hit the one month mark and see if I even have one inch of difference ANYWHERE on my body. I do see more definition in my legs when I walk. That's boosting my ego quite a bit. :)
I was so confused and lost when I started MFP, that I didn't know what to do. One blogger came to my rescue and gave me the link to her blog on which I was able to read the information I needed. Weight Loss Technique is an amazing blog to read because it does go into detail what you should be doing when counting calories. I have no support at all. My friends and family think I'm all nuts, and they hate when I pick food and look at the label. I'm sorry, guys, but I can't be as perfect as you all are. I can't be a size 5, I can't be thin and eat anything, and I am not happy with myself. I wish you all would understand how this makes me feel, but you probably never will.

So this journey, I am doing for myself, all by myself. It's not like this is the first time in my life I've done things alone; it won't be the last.


Toodles!

Without struggle, there is no progress

Dear bloggers,
I visited quite a lot of websites about weight loss trying to get myself into some sort of routine. Health kick has official kicked in and I am sick and tired of the fat girl in the mirror. I've got a lot of information but now I am trying to space out that information and create actual knowledge of fitness. This crap is hard. Whoever said weight loss was easy has been a single digit their whole life. I visited a couple of blogs as well, learning a lot about different people and getting some motivation to continue on my path. I saw this quote on a blog and I absolutely loved it. It is also the title of this post. "Without struggle, there is no progress." Well, if this is true, I should be well on my way to progress. :)

All this time I thought I wanted a workout buddy, but after seeing myself sweat like a pig and look as gross as possible, I think I'm better off working out alone. Yesterday I did another 3 miles, and sweated something horrible! You know the most horrifying things that can happen to you in the gym is looking retarded in front of a cute guy or in front of people who "know what they are doing". Well I ended up with both. I dropped the TV remote, while running, in front of two girls who looked like models. No sweat, no nasty hair, perfection in a body? Yeah, those heifers. I ended up looking clumsy. Then, a really cute guy came to run in the gym and I drop my cell phone, again while running. Horror!

Anyways, I'm going again today.
Toodles!

Feelings..you either eat them or write them

Hello my dear bloggers. I am not having a "myself" day today. I haven't been feeling like myself for the past couple of weeks and I don't particularly like this feeling. I got to thinking about relationships, love, respect and moral fiber these past few weeks. Talking to my friends and family about love, I still after 11 years of dating have not figured it out. Of course, love is different things to different people. Some may see respect as loving someone, some may see putting someone first as love, some are more emotionally challenged and can only love but not show. There are different variations to the effect love has on us. Me personally, I feel love with everything. When I fall in love, I want to be able to say that this person completes me. Two lives forming one is very hard to find because people lately are just looking out for their own interests and have become too selfish to put anyone else first.
Now with that being said, I've done a lot of thinking and have realized that while I am looking for a relationship and looking for the love that I want and need, I am also working on myself and letting go of a lot of things I should have let go before. For example: feelings for my ex, constant put downs by my step-dad, past hurts that I've let build my wall for me. My mother always used to say "everyone comes with baggage but it depends on how much you care for that person to help them unpack theirs." I think of it differently. People should not put their baggage on you, but nurture you past those fears and insecurities. I'm not saying someone should try to change you, but if you're willing to change, why not help you do it?
Speaking to a friend at coffee last night, I've realized I may be looking at relationships somewhat the wrong way. It's not completely wrong, but there are some things I could definitely improve upon and that was pointed out to me last night. Gotta love when you have friends who tell you how it is. I like that. :-)

I may refine this blog more tonight and add more to it, so if you're following, keep a lookout!

Toodles!